Style Maven: Ke$ha and Katy Perry

 

 

This being the end of the year also marks a year worth of blogging for me. This month has been about "Designing Yourself", and to represent this theme as this month's Style Maven, I choose not one, but two girls who "stuck" in the entertainment industry because they willed it into being. Ke$ha and Katy Perry are the two girls who came on the scene with that "stick-appeal". In my fashion, one has "stick-appeal" when you see that someone, and you know you won't forget that you seen them. In our minds, their image implies that they are worthwhile, and you are inclined to learn more about them. You remember that person later when they aren't even around. When these two girls introduced themselves to the world, they had a stick-appeal that I could feel would be around for a substantial amount of time. Katy Perry first came out with "I Kissed a Girl" in 2008, and Kesha came out with "Tik Tok" in 2009. Who knew that now, going into 2013, Kesha has eight top-ten hits, and Katy Perry's “Teenage Dream” album is the second after Michael Jackson to have five songs from a single album make it to number one. In my fashion, the main reason they have stick appeal is because of their value system they have developed for themselves. This month I had offered the "10 Rules to Live By" for each of the 16 personality types described on PersonalityPage.com which offered some good tips on how to live with our personality and interact with others. I wanted to share them because I feel that information to know is a good basis for anyone to gain a greater sense of self as to understand how to refine one's style further, especially with us going into a new year. Kesha and Katy Perry have stick appeal because when they make a move in life, they refuse to stray from the core values they have developed for themselves by learning, and paying attention to their experiences. It reminds me of the quote by the ancient Chinese philosopher, Lao Tse: "Watch your thoughts for they become words. Watch your words for they become actions. Watch your actions for they become... habits. Watch your habits, for they become your character. And watch your character, for it becomes your destiny!" 

10 New Year's Success Tips - Personality Page (Part 8)

As this holiday season draws to a close, its time to tighten our belts and think about where we a going to do with ourselves in 2013. In my Editor's Letter for December I mentioned that I would return to the PersonalityPage.com and examine our personalities in relation to understanding what's important to us, recognizing our weaknesses without hiding behind them, and striving for balance between the dominant functions of our personalities, and our supporting functions. PersonalityPage.com describes more in depth the process of individuation, the process of consciously realizing our true self, and the individual ways each personality can work towards allowing one's strength to flourish, understanding problem areas associated with our personality type, and solutions to living happily in the world as you are. Below I have provided the "10 Rules to Live By" for each personality type provided by the site, suggestions which might resonate with you if you know what your personality type is. Going into 2013, lets see what happens when we try to abide by these rules for ourselves and explore where our personal style can take us in life. The looks associated below with each personality takes a closer look at those party look ideas from my PersonalityPage.com posts from October, looks that, in my fashion, would be quite adventurous to wear when bringing in a year of new adventures.

Ten Rules to Live By to Achieve ENTP (The Visionary) Success

Made in Africa by Arise Magazine

1. Feed Your Strengths! Realize your gift of seeing past the obvious brings you a great capacity to reward yourself and others through your cleverness. Make sure you engage in activities and which can expose this potential at its most valuable level.

2. Face Your Weaknesses! We all have weaknesses. Recognizing your weaknesses for what they are (without beating yourself up) will give you the power to change your life for the better.

3. Talk Through Your Perceptions. Discussing what you see with others will them understand where you are coming from, and offer you the chance to discover the ways in which their input can balance your ideas.

4. Relax and Enjoy the View. Take the time to consider what you have, the gifts life has already brought to you. Try and discover the value and importance of those constant day to day things which support and nourish you.

5. Be Aware of Others. Understand that everyone has their own lives and their own perspectives. Everyone has something to offer. Try to identify people's personality type.

6. Recognize Norms and Structures Are Necessary. Remember that without the support and constancy of others, no-one can follow their dreams. The path you walk was laid by others, each of its stepping stones created to fulfill a different part of the human need for constancy and security. Without this support structure, you cannot go far.

7. Get Out of Your Comfort Zone. Understand that the only way to grow is to get outside of your comfort zone. If you're feeling uncomfortable in situation because it seems to be going nowhere, that's good! That's an opportunity for growth.

8. Identify and Express Your Feelings. You may have a hard time understanding your feelings. It's important that you try to figure this out. Don't let people down. If you determine that you value a person, tell them so every time you think of it. This is the best way to make them feel secure in your affections, and so to promote a long-lasting relationship.

9. Be Accountable for Yourself. Remember that no one has more control over your life than you have. Don't be a victim.

10. Assume the Best, But Be Wary. Your positive attitude nearly always creates positive situations. Just remember: to make them lasting and worthwhile you must build them on solid, carefully planned foundations.

Ten Rules to Live By to Achieve ENTJ (The Executive) Success

1. Feed Your Strengths! Give yourself every opportunity to show others your appreciation of a situation and how you could see it through to a good outcome. Take charge where you can make it count.

2. Face Your Weaknesses! Understand you have limits too. Your careful world view is not the whole deal. How things look and feel may not concern you, but they concern many others. Try and allow such things to be and learn from them.

3. Talk Time to Find Out How Others Really Think. You need to drive past your thoughts with others and let their appreciations of a situation reach you at a deeper level. It will then be possible for you to take account of their needs as real world objectives which if included in your ideas will bring greater harmony and quality to life and relationships.

4. Take Time Out To Let The Whole Situation Speak To You. Don't dismiss those abstract and seemingly hard to understand or bothersome aesthetic and feeling judgments coming from others or from inside yourself. Drop everything for a while, stop thinking and worrying and just relax into those ideas and let them speak to you. Perhaps they can be accommodated, perhaps something is hiding in there which offers a new way

5. When You Get Upset, You Lose. Your energy and rational understandings are strong assets, but can be very harmful if they turn against you and leave you with nothing but emotions you cannot deal with. Remember that others cannot always be expected to fall into your ways of seeing, and when your drive to make them do so fails you will suffer feelings of resentment and even abandonment. You cannot deal with the world like this. Moderate your ideas, allow others their spaces, and you will grow.

6. Respect your Need for Intellectual Compatibility. Don't expect yourself to be a "touchy-feely" or "warm-fuzzy" person. Realize that your most ardent bonds with others will start with the head, rather than the heart. Be aware of other's emotional needs, and express your genuine love and respect for them in terms that are real to YOU. Be yourself.

7. Be Accountable for Yourself. Don't blame the problems in your life on other people. Look inwardly for solutions. No one has more control over your life than you have.

8. Be Humble. Judge yourself at least as harshly as you judge others.

9. Take a Positive Approach to Differences in People. Don't distress yourself and others by dwelling on what seem to be their limitations. They need you to guide them and you need them to see things through. Try and recognize who can perform the most ably within certain fields outside your own competence. Let the feelings of others become a strength rather than a hindrance to you.

10. Don't Get Obsessed! Recognize the value that personal world has to you, your friends, your family, your own inner sense of self worth and life. Take pride in just being a good person and don't allow external situations to control you. Try to relax and let the moment belong to the best things you can find in others and yourself. Nothing out there is more important than your own happiness.

10 New Year's Success Tips - Personality Page (Part 7)

As this holiday season draws to a close, its time to tighten our belts and think about where we a going to do with ourselves in 2013. In my Editor's Letter for December I mentioned that I would return to the PersonalityPage.com and examine our personalities in relation to understanding what's important to us, recognizing our weaknesses without hiding behind them, and striving for balance between the dominant functions of our personalities, and our supporting functions. PersonalityPage.com describes more in depth the process of individuation, the process of consciously realizing our true self, and the individual ways each personality can work towards allowing one's strength to flourish, understanding problem areas associated with our personality type, and solutions to living happily in the world as you are. Below I have provided the "10 Rules to Live By" for each personality type provided by the site, suggestions which might resonate with you if you know what your personality type is. Going into 2013, lets see what happens when we try to abide by these rules for ourselves and explore where our personal style can take us in life. The looks associated below with each personality takes a closer look at those party look ideas from my PersonalityPage.com posts from October, looks that, in my fashion, would be quite adventurous to wear when bringing in a year of new adventures.

Ten Rules to Live By to Achieve ENFP (The Inspirer) Success

Jeremy Laing

1. Feed Your Strengths! Make sure you have opportunities to have new experiences to feel your quest of understanding the world.

2. Face Your Weaknesses! Realize and accept that some traits are strengths and some are weaknesses. By facing your weaknesses, you can overcome them and they will have less power over you.

3. Express Your Feelings. Don't let anger get bottled up inside you. If you have strong feelings, sort them out and express them, or they may become destructive!

4. Make Decisions. Don't be afraid to have an opinion. You need to know how you feel about things in order to be effective.

5. Smile at Criticism. Try to see disagreement and discord as an opportunity for growth, because that's exactly what it is. Try not to become overly defensive towards criticism; try to hear it and judge it objectively.

6. Be Aware of Others. Remember that there are 15 other personality types out there who see things differently than you see them. Most of your problems with other people are easier to deal with if you try to understand the other person's perspective.

7. Be Aware of Yourself. Don't stint your own needs for the sake of others too much. Realize you are an important focus. If you do not fulfill your own needs, how will continue to be effective and how will others know you are true to your beliefs?

8. Be Accountable for Yourself. Don't waste mental energy finding blame in other's behavior  or in identifying yourself as a victim. You have more control over your life than any other person has.

9. Assume the Best. Don't distress yourself by assuming the worst. Remember that a positive attitude creates positive situations.

10. When in Doubt, Ask Questions! Don't assume that the lack of feedback is the same thing as negative feedback. If you need feedback and don't have any, ask for it.

Ten Rules to Live By to Achieve ENFJ (The Giver) Success

Narciso Rodriguez

1. Feed Your Strengths! Make sure you have opportunities to involve yourself with others in situations where your input is valued.

2. Face Your Weaknesses! Realize and accept that some traits are strengths and some are weaknesses. By facing your weaknesses, you can overcome them and they will have less power over you.

3. Express Your Feelings. Understand that your feelings are as important as others are in the overall situation. Without your feelings and needs being valued the best result is not realized  so value and speak to your own feelings as much as you value those of others.

4. Make Decisions. Don't be afraid to have an opinion. You need to know show others the qualities and potentials you can see are worthy of action.

5. Smile at Criticism. Try to see why disagreement and discord indicate the differences between people, and use this as an opportunity to make your value judgments useful for growth, because that's exactly what they are. Try not to feel responsible for another's criticism, but try to hear it and understand the feelings and images it engenders within you. Then you may see a path not only to agreement but to a shared and truly valuable end.

6. Be Aware of Others. Remember that there are 15 other personality types out there who see things differently than you see them. Most of your problems with other people are easier to deal with if you try to understand the other person's perspective.

7. Be Aware of Yourself. Don't stint your own needs for the sake of others too much. Realise you are an important focus. If you do not fulfil your own needs, how will continue to be effective and how will others know you are true to your beliefs?

8. Be Gentle in Your Expectations. It is easy for you to see the value in others, but stressing this too much can drive them away. Try to show that you understand their fears and limitations and lead them gently to see how you feel: lead them gently into understanding and love.

9. Assume the Best. Don't distress yourself by feeling that your values are lost upon others - they are not. Perhaps it just has to sit with them too. Let the situation resolve itself and never stop believing that love is the true answer.

10. When in Doubt, Ask Questions! Don't assume that the lack of feedback is the same thing as negative feedback. If you need feedback and don't have any, ask for it.

10 New Year's Success Tips - Personality Page (Part 6)

As this holiday season draws to a close, its time to tighten our belts and think about where we a going to do with ourselves in 2013. In my Editor's Letter for December I mentioned that I would return to the PersonalityPage.com and examine our personalities in relation to understanding what's important to us, recognizing our weaknesses without hiding behind them, and striving for balance between the dominant functions of our personalities, and our supporting functions. PersonalityPage.com describes more in depth the process of individuation, the process of consciously realizing our true self, and the individual ways each personality can work towards allowing one's strength to flourish, understanding problem areas associated with our personality type, and solutions to living happily in the world as you are. Below I have provided the "10 Rules to Live By" for each personality type provided by the site, suggestions which might resonate with you if you know what your personality type is. Going into 2013, lets see what happens when we try to abide by these rules for ourselves and explore where our personal style can take us in life. The looks associated below with each personality takes a closer look at those party look ideas from my PersonalityPage.com posts from October, looks that, in my fashion, would be quite adventurous to wear when bringing in a year of new adventures.

Ten Rules to Live By to Achieve ESFP (The Performer) Success

Betsey Johnson

1. Feed Your Strengths! Encourage your natural expressive abilities and hands-on talents. Nourish your appreciation of the world. Give yourself opportunities to enjoy life to the full.

2. Face Your Weaknesses! Realize and accept that some traits are strengths and some are weaknesses. Facing and dealing with your weaknesses doesn't mean that you have to change who you are, it means that you want to be the best You possible. By facing your weaknesses, you are honoring your true self, rather than attacking yourself.

3. Express Your Feelings. Don't let worries build up inside of you. If you are troubled by doubt or fear, tell those close to you who will listen and offer counsel. Don't make the mistake of "blipping over it" or "sorting it out" some quick fix way.

4. Listen to Everything. Try not to accept everything at face value. Let everything soak in and listen to your feelings.

5. Smile at Criticism. Remember that people will not always agree with you or understand you, even if they value you greatly. Try to see disagreement and criticism as an opportunity for growth. In fact, that is exactly what it is.

6. Be Aware of Others. Remember that there are 15 other personality types out there who see things differently than you see them. Try to identify other people's types. Try to understand their perspectives.

7. Be Accountable for Yourself. Remember that your every word and action affects those around you, so it is important for you to be fully responsible for your self, and to the values you hold.

8. Be Gentle in Your Expectations. You will always be disappointed with others if you expect too much of them. Being disappointed with another person is the best way to drive them away. Treat others with the same gentleness that you would like to be treated with.

9. Assume the Best. Don't distress yourself by assuming the worst. Remember that a positive attitude often creates positive situations.

10. When in Doubt, Ask Questions! If something seems to be wrong and you can't put your finger on it, maybe someone else can. Remember, there are many ways of seeing the world, and perhaps someone else's way will reveal the truth.

Ten Rules to Live By to Achieve ESFJ (The Caregiver) Success

Behnaz Sarafpour

1. Feed Your Strengths! Let your talent for caring and giving spill out into the world around you, show your gifts to the world. Allow yourself to take opportunities to nurture and develop situations in your home and work environments which bring value for yourself and others. Find work or a hobby which allows you to realise these strengths.

2. Face Your Weaknesses! Realize and accept that some things are never going to be how you would like them to be. Understand that other peoples need to deal with the world regardless of how it seems. Facing and dealing with discord or differences in others doesn't mean that you have to change who you are; it means that you are giving yourself opportunities to grow. By facing your weaknesses, you honour your true self and that of others.

3. Discover the World of Others. Don't let yourself fall into the trap of thinking you always know what is right for others. Open your heart to the possibility of understanding that their true needs are something that must be discovered through a recognition that their view of the world might be very different, yet just as valid as your own.

4. Don't be too hasty. Try to let things settle before you make a judgement, allowing others to discover the best for themselves while you try to see all the variables and contingencies in a situation.

5. Look Carefully at the World. Remember, things are not always what they seem on the surface. You might need to look deeper to discover the truth, particularly when it seems you are sure of your first quick judgement. There are layers of meaning and truth beneath everything.

6. Try to Let Others Take Some of the Load. By letting others make their own judgements, you are not letting things get out of control, but are validating their own need to be a part of your life. Remember, it is better to guide another to see your point of view than keeping them out of the picture.

7. Be Accountable to Others. Remember that they need to understand you and your needs too. Express your doubts and difficulties as well as your reasons and let them become partners to your goals.

8. Don't Hem Yourself in. Staying in your comfort zone is self defeating in the end. Try to make every day one where you get out and discover a little something different about the world and others. This will broaden your horizons and bring new ideas and opportunities into focus.

9. Assume the Best and Seek for it. Don't wait for others to live up to your expectations. Every person has a goldmine of worth in them, just as every situation can be turned to some good. If you let yourself believe this, you will find yourself discovering ways to make it true for you.

10. When in Doubt, Ask For Help! Don't let your fears leave you on the horns of a dilemma or lead you into disaster. If you are uncertain of something or someone then get input from others who have greater experience in dealing with this difficulty.

10 New Year's Success Tips - Personality Page (Part 5)

As this holiday season draws to a close, its time to tighten our belts and think about where we a going to do with ourselves in 2013. In my Editor's Letter for December I mentioned that I would return to the PersonalityPage.com and examine our personalities in relation to understanding what's important to us, recognizing our weaknesses without hiding behind them, and striving for balance between the dominant functions of our personalities, and our supporting functions. PersonalityPage.com describes more in depth the process of individuation, the process of consciously realizing our true self, and the individual ways each personality can work towards allowing one's strength to flourish, understanding problem areas associated with our personality type, and solutions to living happily in the world as you are. Below I have provided the "10 Rules to Live By" for each personality type provided by the site, suggestions which might resonate with you if you know what your personality type is. Going into 2013, lets see what happens when we try to abide by these rules for ourselves and explore where our personal style can take us in life. The looks associated below with each personality takes a closer look at those party look ideas from my PersonalityPage.com posts from October, looks that, in my fashion, would be quite adventurous to wear when bringing in a year of new adventures.

Ten Rules to Live By to Achieve ESTP (The Doer) Success

Son Jung Wan

1. Feed Your Strengths! Give yourself every opportunity to show your innate skills. If you are not in a relationship or a job which allows this to happen, it might be time to discover ways to change this. Remember, your strengths derive from being able to deal with the world, with situations where getting things done, where opportunities to surmount difficulty exist.

2. Face Your Weaknesses. Try to be straight up with yourself. You have limitations others find as strengths. So what? You don't have to hide behind a curtain of fear just because you have difficulty with feelings or sorting out your inner perceptions. Allow yourself to be who you are and at the same time let others help you be more honest with your limitations.

3. Talk About Your Thoughts. Discussing your ideas and perceptions with others will help you to develop your separate, inner reality, make you a "real" person to them even without all that external activity. How well you use your auxiliary function is very important to your overall health and happiness.

4. Don't Be Afraid to Show Emotion. Your inferior functions want you to be still a child inside, and that makes you run, that makes you want to prove yourself even more. You don't have to prove anything to anyone in this regard. Everyone feel emotion and everyone is a little child inside. Find those people whose eyes tell you that you are not alone, and let them hear your child's voice.

5. Respect Your Need for Action. Understand that you need to be actively working with your environment to be "in the groove" with life. Don't chastise yourself for not being the sort to sit around and read a book or watch a movie. Choose a partner and companions who value active lifestyles, but remember to allow yourself time out to consider how their input into your life will change it. Don't just follow your nose - life is not an endless party or expedition.

6. Recognize the Differences in Others. Realize that everyone is different, not just a little different, but very different. Everyone has their place and value. You need to notice those values and places, places where you cannot easily fit. You can learn from these people, for they have gifts you can use, gifts they offer simply by being who they are. Try figuring out their psychological type for yourself and notice how certain types can lift you out of negative feelings just by being who they are.

7. It's OK to Get Out of your Comfort Zone. Understand that the only way to grow is to get outside of your comfort zone. If you're uncomfortable with an idea or situation because you're not sure how to act, that's good! That's an opportunity for growth.

8. Identify and Express Your Feelings. You may have a hard time figuring out exactly how you feel about someone that you're involved with. It's important that you do figure this out. Don't lead someone on with your ambivalence. If you determine that you value the person, tell them so every time you think of it. This is the best way to make them feel secure in your affections, and so to promote a long-lasting relationship.

9. Be Aware that You can Fail, and that it is OK. Not every mountain can be climbed, not every customer will be satisfied, no matter how hard you try or no matter what tricks you bring to bear. Getting beaten is an opportunity to reflect upon what is important, what really matters in life. Next time you will take up a challenge more worthy of your skills, and more valuable to others. You can be a champion, and it will be at your own game. Try to let it be a game of life, where everyone wins if you do.

10. Assume the Best. Don't distress yourself with fear and dark imaginings. Expect the best, and the best will come.

Ten Rules to Live By to Achieve ESTJ (The Guardian) Success

Louise Goldin

1. Feed Your Strengths! You have been given the great ability to create logical, ethical principles that transcend personal experience. Allow these principles to be as good as they can be by creating them with consideration for all available data.

2. Face Your Weaknesses! See your weaknesses for what they are, and seek to overcome them. Especially, resist the tendency to judge too quickly, and remember the importance of considering other people's feelings.

3. Talk Through the Facts or write them down. You need to step through the facts in order to define good principles to live by. Verbalizing them or putting them down on paper may be a valuable tool for you.

4. Take in Everything. Don't dismiss ideas prematurely because you think you already know the answer. Seek first to understand, and then to be understood.

5. When You Get Angry, You Lose. Your passion for your principles is admirable, but becomes destructive when you fall into the "Anger Trap." Remember that Anger is destructive to personal relationships, and can be extremely hurtful to others. Work through your anger before you unleash it upon others. Disagreements and disappointments can only be handled effectively in a non-personal and dispassionate manner.

6. Be Yourself in Relationships. Don't expect yourself to be a "touchy-feely" or "warm fuzzy" person. Realize that your most ardent bonds start with the head, rather than the heart. You expect your actions to speak for themselves to your loved ones. This may not be enough for some. Be aware of other's emotional needs, and express your genuine love and respect for them in terms that are real to YOU. Be yourself.

7. Be Accountable for Yourself. Don't blame the problems in your life on other people. Look inwardly for solutions. No one has more control over your life than you have.

8. Be Humble. Judge yourself at least as harshly as you judge others.

9. Resist the Urge to Control Others. You can't force others to adhere to your ways of thinking. You may think that you know what's best for others, but you really only know how they can best act according to your ideas of what is right. Just as you are entitled to live as you see fit, so are they. Instead of judging and controlling others, focus on using your judgement to create better impartial principles.

10. Spend Some Time Alone. Encourage the development of your introverted side. You'll find many tangible benefits to becoming a more well-rounded person.

10 New Year's Success Tips - Personality Page (Part 4)

As this holiday season draws to a close, its time to tighten our belts and think about where we a going to do with ourselves in 2013. In my Editor's Letter for December I mentioned that I would return to the PersonalityPage.com and examine our personalities in relation to understanding what's important to us, recognizing our weaknesses without hiding behind them, and striving for balance between the dominant functions of our personalities, and our supporting functions. PersonalityPage.com describes more in depth the process of individuation, the process of consciously realizing our true self, and the individual ways each personality can work towards allowing one's strength to flourish, understanding problem areas associated with our personality type, and solutions to living happily in the world as you are. Below I have provided the "10 Rules to Live By" for each personality type provided by the site, suggestions which might resonate with you if you know what your personality type is. Going into 2013, lets see what happens when we try to abide by these rules for ourselves and explore where our personal style can take us in life. The looks associated below with each personality takes a closer look at those party look ideas from my PersonalityPage.com posts from October, looks that, in my fashion, would be quite adventurous to wear when bringing in a year of new adventures.

Ten Rules to Live By to Achieve INTJ (The Scientist) Success

Calvin Klien

1. Feed Your Strengths! Do things that allow your brilliant intuition and logical abilities to flourish. Explore the fascinating worlds of science, mathematics, law and medicine. Give your mind an outlet for its exceptional analytical abilities, and watch them grow.

2. Face Your Weaknesses! See your weaknesses for what they are, and seek to overcome them. Especially, strive to use your judgment against your internal ideas and intuitions, rather than as a means of disregarding other people's ideas.

3. Talk Through Your Thoughts. You need to step through your intuitions in order to put them into perspective. Give yourself time to do this, and take advantage of discussing ideas with others. You'll find externalizing your internal intuitions to be a valuable exercise. If you don't have someone to discuss your ideas with, try expressing your ideas clearly in writing.

4. Take in Everything. Don't dismiss ideas prematurely because you don't respect the person generating the ideas, or because you think you already know it all. After all, everybody has something to offer, and nobody knows everything. Steven Covey says it so well when he says: "Seek first to understand, and then to be understood."

5. When You Get Angry, You Lose. Your passion and intensity are strong assets, but can be very harmful if you allow yourself to fall into the "Anger Trap". Remember that Anger is destructive to your personal relationships. Work through your anger before you impress it upon others, or you will likely find yourself alone. Disagreements and disappointments can only be handled effectively in a non-personal and dispassionate manner.

6. Respect your Need for Intellectual Compatibility. Don't expect yourself to be a "touchy-feely" or "warm-fuzzy" person. Realize that your most ardent bonds with others will start with the head, rather than the heart. Be aware of other's emotional needs, and express your genuine love and respect for them in terms that are real to YOU. Be yourself.

7. Be Accountable for Yourself. Don't blame the problems in your life on other people. Look inwardly for solutions. No one has more control over your life than you have.

8. Be Humble. Judge yourself at least as harshly as you judge others.

9. Assume the Best. Don't distress yourself and others by dwelling on the dark side of everything. Just as there is a positive charge for every negative charge, there is a light side to every dark side. Remember that positive situations are created by positive attitudes. Expect the best, and the best will come forward.

10. Don't Get Isolated! Recognize the value that the external world represents to you, and interact with it in the style that's natural to you. Join clubs and internet e-mail lists that house in-depth discussions of topics that you're interested in. Seek and foster friendships with others of like competence and capacity for understanding. Extravert in your own style.

Ten Rules to Live By to Achieve INTP (The Thinker) Success

Dennis Basso

1. Feed Your Strengths! Realize your gift at mastering logical problems and situations, and give yourself plenty of opportunities to exercise your abilities. Much of your sense of well-being will come from these experiences.

2. Face Your Weaknesses! We all have weaknesses. Recognizing your weaknesses for what they are (without beating yourself up) will give you the power to change your life for the better.

3. Talk About Your Thoughts. Discussing your ideas and perceptions with others will help you to develop your Extraverted INtuition, and thus your understanding of the world. How well you use your auxiliary function is very important to your overall health and happiness.

4. Listen to Everything. Try not to dismiss anything immediately. Let it soak in, and then apply judgement. Try not to dismiss things that are alogical - they are not illogical.

5. Be Aware of Others. Understand that everyone has their own lives and their own perspectives. Everyone has something to offer. Try to identify people's personality type.

6. Recognize Social Principles. Realize that our society functions around some basic social principles, and that our society would fail unless those principles are recognized and upheld. In a democracy, people vote. At a red stoplight, people stop. If people stopped voting because it wasn't important them, who would be in power? If people stopped stopping at red stop lights because it didn't fit into their plans, how could we drive safely? Your priorities and plans are important, but you must recognize that the external world's agenda is also important. Don't dismiss the importance of principles that don't affect your life directly.

7. Get Out of Your Comfort Zone. Understand that the only way to grow is to get outside of your comfort zone. If you're uncomfortable with an idea or situation because you're not sure how to act, that's good! That's an opportunity for growth.

8. Identify and Express Your Feelings. You may have a hard time understanding how you feel about someone. It's important that you do figure this out. Don't lead someone on with your ambivalence. If you determine that you value the person, tell them so every time you think of it. This is the best way to make them feel secure in your affections, and so to promote a long-lasting relationship.

9. Be Accountable for Yourself. Remember that no one has more control over your life than you have. Don't be a victim.

10. Assume the Best. Don't distress yourself with fear and dark expectations. Remember that a positive attitude often creates positive situations.

10 New Year's Success Tips - Personality Page (Part 3)

As this holiday season draws to a close, its time to tighten our belts and think about where we a going to do with ourselves in 2013. In my Editor's Letter for December I mentioned that I would return to the PersonalityPage.com and examine our personalities in relation to understanding what's important to us, recognizing our weaknesses without hiding behind them, and striving for balance between the dominant functions of our personalities, and our supporting functions. PersonalityPage.com describes more in depth the process of individuation, the process of consciously realizing our true self, and the individual ways each personality can work towards allowing one's strength to flourish, understanding problem areas associated with our personality type, and solutions to living happily in the world as you are. Below I have provided the "10 Rules to Live By" for each personality type provided by the site, suggestions which might resonate with you if you know what your personality type is. Going into 2013, lets see what happens when we try to abide by these rules for ourselves and explore where our personal style can take us in life. The looks associated below with each personality takes a closer look at those party look ideas from my PersonalityPage.com posts from October, looks that, in my fashion, would be quite adventurous to wear when bringing in a year of new adventures.

Ten Rules to Live By to Achieve INFJ (The Protector) Success

Concept Korea

1. Feed Your Strengths! Do things that allow your brilliant intuition and service-oriented manner to flourish. 

2. Face Your Weaknesses! See your weaknesses for what they are, and seek to overcome them. Especially, strive to use your judgment against your internal ideas and intuitions, rather than as a means of disregarding other people's ideas. 

3. Talk Through Your Thoughts. You need to step through your intuitions in order to put them into perspective. Give yourself time to do this, and take advantage of discussing ideas with others. You'll find externalizing your internal intuitions to be a valuable exercise. 

4. Take in Everything. Don't dismiss ideas prematurely because you don't respect the person generating the ideas, or because you think you already know it all. After all, everybody has something to offer, and nobody knows everything. Steven Covey says it so well when he says: "Seek first to understand, and then to be understood." 

5. When You Get Angry, You Lose. Your passion and intensity are strong assets, but can be very harmful if you allow yourself to fall into the "Anger Trap". Remember that Anger is destructive to your personal relationships. Work through your anger before you impress it upon others, or you will likely find yourself alone. Disagreements and disappointments can only be handled effectively in a non-personal and dispassionate manner. 

6. Keep Your Eye on the Big Picture. Watch out for your tendency to become obsessed with details. If you find yourself feeling very, very strongly about a small detail, take a big step back and make sure that you can still see the goal. You're not going to get there if you get mired in the details. 

7. Be Accountable for Yourself. Don't blame the problems in your life on other people. Look inwardly for solutions. No one has more control over your life than you have. 

8. Be Humble. Judge yourself at least as harshly as you judge others. 

9. Assume the Best. Don't distress yourself and others by dwelling on the dark side of everything. Just as there is a positive charge for every negative charge, there is a light side to every dark side. Remember that positive situations are created by positive attitudes. Expect the best, and the best will come forward. 

10. Relax! Do yourself a favor and learn how to effectively unwind. Get exercise and restful sleep. Take vacations. Engage in relaxing activities. Take care of yourself and your loved ones by learning to let go of your passion and intensity for a respite. 

Ten Rules to Live By to Achieve INFP (The Idealist) Success 

Marchesa

1. Feed Your Strengths! Encourage your natural artistic abilities and creativity. Nourish your spirituality. Give yourself opportunities to help the needy or underprivileged. 

2. Face Your Weaknesses! Realize and accept that some traits are strengths and some are weaknesses. Facing and dealing with your weaknesses doesn't mean that you have to change who you are, it means that you want to be the best You possible. By facing your weaknesses, you are honoring your true self, rather than attacking yourself. 

3. Express Your Feelings. Don't let unexpressed emotions build up inside of you. If you have strong feelings, sort them out and express them, Don't let them build up inside you to the point where they become unmanageable! 

4. Listen to Everything. Try not to dismiss anything immediately. Let everything soak in for awhile, then apply judgment. 

5. Smile at Criticism. Remember that people will not always agree with you or understand you, even if they value you greatly. Try to see disagreement and criticism as an opportunity for growth. In fact, that is exactly what it is. 

6. Be Aware of Others. Remember that there are 15 other personality types out there who see things differently than you see them. Try to identify other people's types. Try to understand their perspectives. 

7. Be Accountable for Yourself. Remember that YOU have more control over your life than any other person has. 

8. Be Gentle in Your Expectations. You will always be disappointed with others if you expect too much of them. Being disappointed with another person is the best way to drive them away. Treat others with the same gentleness that you would like to be treated with. 

9. Assume the Best. Don't distress yourself by assuming the worst. Remember that a positive attitude often creates positive situations. 

10. When in Doubt, Ask Questions! Don't assume that the lack of feedback is the same thing as negative feedback. If you need feedback and don't have any, ask for it.

10 New Year's Success Tips - Personality Page (Part 2)

As this holiday season draws to a close, its time to tighten our belts and think about where we a going to do with ourselves in 2013. In my Editor's Letter for December I mentioned that I would return to the PersonalityPage.com and examine our personalities in relation to understanding what's important to us, recognizing our weaknesses without hiding behind them, and striving for balance between the dominant functions of our personalities, and our supporting functions. PersonalityPage.com describes more in depth the process of individuation, the process of consciously realizing our true self, and the individual ways each personality can work towards allowing one's strength to flourish, understanding problem areas associated with our personality type, and solutions to living happily in the world as you are. Below I have provided the "10 Rules to Live By" for each personality type provided by the site, suggestions which might resonate with you if you know what your personality type is. Going into 2013, lets see what happens when we try to abide by these rules for ourselves and explore where our personal style can take us in life. The looks associated below with each personality takes a closer look at those party look ideas from my PersonalityPage.com posts from October, looks that, in my fashion, would be quite adventurous to wear when bringing in a year of new adventures.

Ten Rules to Live By to Achieve ISFJ (The Nurturer) Success

Rodarte

1. Feed Your Strengths! Let your talent for recognising harmony and balance spill out into the world around you, show your gifts to the world. Allow yourself to take opportunities to design, reorganise and rebalance things to make your home and work environments better for yourself and others. Find work or a hobby which allows you to realize these strengths.

2. Face Your Weaknesses! Realize and accept that some things are never going to be how you would like them to be. Understand that other peoples feelings are sometimes more important than whether they are right or wrong. Facing and dealing with discord or differences in others doesn't mean that you have to change who you are; it means that you are giving yourself opportunities to grow. By facing your weaknesses, you honour your true self and that of others.

3. Discover the World of Others. Don't let yourself fall into the trap of thinking you always know what is right for others. Open your heart to the possibility of understanding that their true needs are something that must be discovered through relationship, and recognition that their world might be very different, yet just as valid as your own.

4. Don't be too hasty. Try to let things settle before you make a judgement, allowing others to discover the best for themselves while you feel your way into their way of seeing things.

5. Look Carefully at the World. Remember, things are not always what they seem on the surface. You might need to look deeper to discover the truth, particularly when it seems you are sure of your first quick judgement. There are layers of meaning and truth beneath everything.

6. Try to Let Others Take Some of the Load. By letting others help, you are not letting things get out of control, but are validating their own need to be a part of your life. Remember, it is better to guide another to see your point of view than keeping them out of the picture.

7. Be Accountable to Others. Remember that they need to understand you and your needs too. Express your feelings and reasons and let them become partners to your goals.

8. Don't Hem Yourself in. Staying in your comfort zone is self defeating in the end. Try to make every day one where you get out and discover a little something different about the world and others. This will broaden your horizons and bring new ideas and opportunities into focus.

9. Assume the Best and Seek for it. Don't wait for others to live up to your expectations. Every person has a goldmine of worth in them, just as every situation can be turned to some good. If you let yourself believe this, you will find yourself discovering ways to make it true for you.

10. When in Doubt, Ask For Help! Don't let your sense of self sufficiency leave you on the horns of a dilemma or lead you into disaster. If you are uncertain of something or someone then get input from others you trust.

Ten Rules to Live By to Achieve ISFP (The Artist) Success

Catherine Malandrino

1. Feed Your Strengths! Encourage your natural artistic abilities and creativity. Nourish your spirituality. Give yourself opportunities to help the needy or underprivileged. 

2. Face Your Weaknesses! Realize and accept that some traits are strengths and some are weaknesses. Facing and dealing with your weaknesses doesn't mean that you have to change who you are, it means that you want to be the best You possible. By facing your weaknesses, you are honoring your true self, rather than attacking yourself. 

3. Express Your Feelings. Don't let unexpressed emotions build up inside of you. If you have strong feelings, sort them out and express them, Don't let them build up inside you to the point where they become unmanageable! 

4. Listen to Everything. Try not to dismiss anything immediately. Let everything soak in for awhile, then apply judgment. 

5. Smile at Criticism. Remember that people will not always agree with you or understand you, even if they value you greatly. Try to see disagreement and criticism as an opportunity for growth. In fact, that is exactly what it is. 

6. Be Aware of Others. Remember that there are 15 other personality types out there who see things differently than you see them. Try to identify other people's types. Try to understand their perspectives. 

7. Be Accountable for Yourself. Remember that YOU have more control over your life than any other person has. 

8. Be Gentle in Your Expectations. You will always be disappointed with others if you expect too much of them. Being disappointed with another person is the best way to drive them away. Treat others with the same gentleness that you would like to be treated with. 

9. Assume the Best. Don't distress yourself by assuming the worst. Remember that a positive attitude often creates positive situations. 

10. When in Doubt, Ask Questions! Don't assume that the lack of feedback is the same thing as negative feedback. If you need feedback and don't have any, ask for it.

10 New Year's Success Tips - Personality Page (Part 1)

As this holiday season draws to a close, its time to tighten our belts and think about where we a going to do with ourselves in 2013. In my Editor's Letter for December I mentioned that I would return to the PersonalityPage.com and examine our personalities in relation to understanding what's important to us, recognizing our weaknesses without hiding behind them, and striving for balance between the dominant functions of our personalities, and our supporting functions. PersonalityPage.com describes more in depth the process of individuation, the process of consciously realizing our true self, and the individual ways each personality can work towards allowing one's strength to flourish, understanding problem areas associated with our personality type, and solutions to living happily in the world as you are. Below I have provided the "10 Rules to Live By" for each personality type provided by the site, suggestions which might resonate with you if you know what your personality type is. Going into 2013, lets see what happens when we try to abide by these rules for ourselves and explore where our personal style can take us in life. The looks associated below with each personality takes a closer look at those party look ideas from my PersonalityPage.com posts from October, looks that, in my fashion, would be quite adventurous to wear when bringing in a year of new adventures.

Ten Rules to Live By to Achieve ISTJ (The Duty Fulfiller) Success

J. Mendel

1. Feed Your Strengths! Do things that allow your excellent organizational and logical abilities to flourish. Explore the worlds of business management, accounting, and medicine. 

2. Face Your Weaknesses! See your weaknesses for what they are, and seek to overcome them. Especially, strive to use your judgment against your internal store of knowledge, rather than as a means of disregarding other people's ideas. 

3. Talk Through Your Thoughts. You need to step through your vast amount of information in order to put things into perspective. Give yourself appropriate time to do this, and take advantage of discussing ideas with others. Some find that externalizing your thoughts is a valuable exercise, as is expressing your ideas clearly in writing. 

4. Take in Everything. Don't dismiss ideas prematurely because you don't respect the person generating the ideas, or because you think you already know it all. After all, everybody has something to offer, and nobody knows everything. As Steven Covey says, "Seek first to understand, and then to be understood." 

5. Quench Your Desire to Control Others. Remember that most people do not want to be controlled. Again, turn your controlling tendencies inwardly rather than outwardly. You can only really control yourself. 

6. Be Aware of Others. Take time to notice where others are coming from. What is their personality type? How are they currently feeling? 

7. Be Accountable for Yourself. Don't blame the problems in your life on other people. Look inwardly for solutions. 

8. Be Gentle in Your Expectations, and judge yourself at least as harshly as you judge others. 

9. Assume the Best. Don't distress yourself and others by dwelling on the dark side of everything. Just as there is a positive charge for every negative charge, there is a light side to every dark side. Remember that positive situations are created by positive attitudes, and vice versa. Expect the best, and the best will come forward. 

10. There is Nothing to Fear but Fear Itself. Sometimes it's necessary to take a risk to initiate change. Don't be afraid to do so when that time comes. In most cases, the obstacles and burdens standing in the way of your goal are not really there--they just exist in your perspective. Change your perspective--change your life. 

Ten Rules to Live By to Achieve ISTP (The Mechanic) Success

alicia + olivia

1. Feed Your Strengths! Realize your gift at mastering your physical environment, and give yourself plenty of opportunities to exercise your abilities. Ride, play, paint, work it. Much of your sense of well-being will come from these experiences. 

2. Face Your Weaknesses! Face your fear of the unknown, and get yourself into new situations. Experience new activities and people with new perspectives. Don't isolate yourself into a narrow and lonely existence. 

3. Talk About Your Thoughts. Discussing your ideas and perceptions with others will help you to develop your Extraverted Sensing, and thus your understanding of the world. How well you use your auxiliary function is very important to your overall health and happiness. 

4. Don't Be Afraid to Love. That's just your old inferior function trying to convince you that you're unloved and unloveable. It's not true. Just because you're not sure what to do with yourself doesn't mean that you can't learn! Go on... jump in. The water's warm. 

5. Respect Your Need for Action. Understand that you need to be actively working with your environment to be "in the groove" with life. Don't chastise yourself for not being the sort to sit around and read a book or watch a movie. Choose a partner and companions who value active lifestyles. 

6. Recognize Social Principles. Realize that our society functions around some basic social principles, and that our society would fail unless those principles are recognized and upheld. In a democracy, people vote. At a red stoplight, people stop. If people stopped voting because it wasn't important to their own way of life, who would be in power? If people stopped stopping at red stop lights because it didn't fit into their way of life, how could we drive safely? Your priorities and beliefs are important, but you must recognize that the external world's agenda is also important. Don't dismiss the importance of principles that don't affect your life directly. 

7. It's OK to Get Out of your Comfort Zone. Understand that the only way to grow is to get outside of your comfort zone. If you're uncomfortable with an idea or situation because you're not sure how to act, that's good! That's an opportunity for growth. 

8. Identify and Express Your Feelings. You may have a hard time figuring out exactly how you feel about someone that you're involved with. It's important that you do figure this out. Don't lead someone on with your ambivalence. If you determine that you value the person, tell them so every time you think of it. This is the best way to make them feel secure in your affections, and so to promote a long-lasting relationship. 

9. Be Aware of Others. Try to really identify where people are coming from. Their ideas, thoughts and priorities are differents from yours. They have something to offer you. Try to identify their personality types. 

10. Assume the Best. Don't distress yourself with fear and dark imaginings. Expect the best, and the best will come.

READing Your Style: The Others and the Cursed

Fashion Blogger, Bryan Boy

Blogging in general has democratized multimedia and journalism where most anyone can be seen as a viable source of news in any given subject. CNN recently interviewed fashion blogger, Leandra Medine (23), of "Man Repeller" who has become a sought after business liaison for designers, and publications with her blog, and fan following. With her unique blogging perspective she has created a direct line to fans and potential consumers with her commentary on sartorial decision making making her an awesome marketing tool for designers in an indirect way. She had a pretty busy show season as it would appear from the CNN article.  BryanBoy is another among the many fashion bloggers that have rose to prominence in this internet dominated age of entertainment. BryanBoy tickles me so! If you are unfamiliar with the international fashion blogger, you could have seen him on television as Tyra Bank's social media correspondent on this past season of America's Top Model: College Edition. With social media and the internet, Fashion Bloggers are quickly changing the scope of the fashion industry making fashion more accessible to consumers and creating a new way to enjoy fashion. Fashion is always sending out the message that "You Design Yourself" and Fashion Bloggers today are a true testament to the fact that we do, in fact, have the power to carve and create our own path in life by marketing the quintessential package: ourselves!

Below is a post entitiled, "The Others and the Cursed" from BryanBoy that I enjoyed because, feeling "cursed" myself, I felt this post was great insight to the minds of us who put a bit more effort into expressing our sense of self:

BryanBoy in Hong Kong

While waiting for the 6 Train last night, I sat beside this lone guy in his very early 20s carrying a number of paper bags. Someone took advantage of the beautiful, sunny Saturday afternoon to shop. He went to Hollister, Who.A.U (yes, I googled. Click HERE) and Victoria’s Secret, amongst other places. I couldn’t resist noticing him because of the distinct, pink Victoria’s Secret bag. Was he a sister? A secret Shim? Or a straight guy looking to get laid? I guess I’ll never know.

Gaydar calibration aside, that’s not the point.

The point is, millions of people around the world spend their Saturday afternoons shopping. Most of these people are buying things, random things, to improve their lives… you know, to make themselves happy, to make themselves feel good, to make themselves look good. To most of these people, shopping is an activity that gives them pleasure. Or the people around them, if they’re buying gifts.

I find it fascinating though how the majority of people around the world have simple, fuzz-free taste.

Fascinating as in I kinda feel jealous.

During the train ride home, I asked myself, why am I not one of those people?

Why can’t I just walk in to any random shop and buy things that I like? Instead, I always engage in a mental conversation with myself to rationalize my purchases. In spite of the occasional impulse buys, most of my purchases are now calculated with extreme precision worse than a penny-pinching bag lady carrying a calculator at the supermarket. Buying things just because you like it is no longer enough. Do I really need this? Is it worth the price I’m paying for? Can I get it cheaper online? Was this item made by an army of bionic toddlers in Pakistan? Is this item overexposed? Has anyone blogged about it? How many blog posts can I get from it? Is it an advertiser? Is there a press discount? Will the sample be sent? If yes, how long? Do other trannies have it? What is the lifespan of this item? Is it ok to wear it over and over and over again for the next two months? Can I still wear it three months from now? What is the cost-per-wear ratio?

There is something VERY pure about people who buy simple, modest, humble things at simple, modest, humble shops — they don’t give a flying fiver! And that, my friends, is the best thing in the world.

Am I cursed?

Perhaps someone dropped me on my head when I was a child?

Is ‘this’ (the curse) the result of being exposed to years and years and years and years of poring over fashion magazines, traveling, being aware of what my options are and knowing there are better things out there?

During a weekend afternoon in Stockholm last month, Rumi, my boyfriend and I went shopping. I saw this cute sweater on a rack somewhere. My two beloved individuals gave me funny looks when I picked it up. “After experiencing cashmere, I don’t think you should settle for acrylic,” Rumi quipped. And she was right.

It’s frustrating because the older I get, the more I want things that nobody else has, the more I want to be the first to be wearing, the more I want things that are obscene, the more I want things that are obscenely expensive (even if I couldn’t afford it), the more I want things that people have already worn ages ago so they don’t want them anymore and are now affordable, the more I don’t want to look like anyone else. I find it cool when people ask you where an item is from as opposed to wearing something of the moment, something oh so identifiable “oh hay gurl I love your *insert label here* this and that”.

Do I want the new, ultra chic black Patient Zero Saint Laurent Paris bag? O HALE YES. But it’s three fucking thousand dollars and it wouldn’t take very long for every bitch and tranny to carry them in no time (see Celine bags, see bloggers 2.0, bloggers 3.0, see bloggers 4.0, see Kim Kardashian. in that pecking order). And for three fucking thousand dollars I don’t want to be one of the flock. Woe is me.

Do I want small, strappy two-tone dyed pony skin 3.1 Phillip Lim bag? Yes, I want the small, strappy, two-tone dyed pony skin 3.1 Phillip Lim bag. Did I buy the small, strappy two-tone dyed pony skin 3.1 Phillip Lim bag? Yes, I bought the small, strapy two-tone dyed pony skin 3.1 Phillip Lim bag at the sample sale. Hello? It’s a no-brainer!

Eeew. I’m gonna stop rambling. Clearly I’m self-obsessed. In my attempt to demystify others, I ended up demystifying myself.

Go fuck yourselves and enjoy the weekend. It’s nice and sunny out there and I still need a god damn dining table.

Happy shopping!